RecoverYourLife.com Forums http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum Welcome to RecoverYourLife.com - Information and support for all forms of Self Harm, including self injury, eating disorders and other depression related conditions en Thu, 17 May 2012 10:14:56 GMT vBulletin 1 http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/images/ca_morpheus_blue/misc/rss.jpg RecoverYourLife.com Forums http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum <![CDATA[what's the point?]]> http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188270&goto=newpost Thu, 17 May 2012 09:43:04 GMT everything goes to hell, my whole world crashes. first my friend's
commits suicide and then my grandmother dies and I know it is my fault she's dead, I should have listened to her and started to wonder when she said she was dizzy and had fallen, but no, I just ignored it and then seven hours later she was dead why? and now my other grandmother is in the hospital and it feels like everything is my fault. Why are all around me dieing? Maybe I should take my life so that no other who I love dies.
I was also in the emergency room again and got stitches again I am so tired of this. I'm still thinking on what the nurse told me when the doctor ask if it looked good when she just said "it's no use that we make it look good because he will still come here again soon" and then when I walked away she said "I do not want to see you here again "as if she hated me. but how can I blame her I'm still so fucking useless.
So what's the point of living? ]]> Serious Discussion and Advice vonAppen http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188270 <![CDATA[alcohol.. & ya......]]> http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188269&goto=newpost Thu, 17 May 2012 09:38:44 GMT Is it bad that I dont get drunkanymore? I hardly drink & I will drink a lot but I just don't get drunk.. and I don't enjoy it. I loved alcohol when I was in my sickness. I think I can finally live without it.... I'm kind of surprised. I honestly never imagined I was prepared to live with the problem forever. As I am an alcoholic addict. But... ya. . Like I don't get it. I don't get how I'm 6 4.. less than 200 pounds and I can slam a handle and not get drunk..... like I'm flabbergasted. If that's a word... ]]> Substance Abuse Forum mat http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188269 Tumblr links now banned. http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188268&goto=newpost Thu, 17 May 2012 09:02:51 GMT The moderators have just posted this (http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/announcement.php?f=21) announcement and we are aware its probably going to go down like a tonne of bricks, however, it doesnt seem to be replyable, (definitely a word) so,... The moderators have just posted this announcement and we are aware its probably going to go down like a tonne of bricks, however, it doesnt seem to be replyable, (definitely a word) so, all feedback/questions etc welcome here, but please keep it nice.

x ]]> Forum and Community Questions squirrelspit http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188268 Job Interviews and being at Work. http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188266&goto=newpost Thu, 17 May 2012 06:42:02 GMT One of the bosses at my dad's office (my dad is the managing director there) has asked me to come and work voluntarily for his research team (they are an engineering consultancy, particular branch: oil, gas and petrochemicals).

I have worked at my dad's office before, but it was less "serious" that time. This time I want to take it seriously. So I have some questions:

1. What should I wear? I need a compromise: I have sensory issues around many types of clothes, so no tights/tight trousers/denim (I cannot cope with denim)/polyester/wool etc. And I haven't worn a skirt or a dress for several years because I feel totally "wrong" in them (I am not sure why). Also I am not buying new shoes, I will wear my army boots because once you cover them with trousers, so that you can only see the foot bit, they look quite smart. So what clothes should I wear?

2. How should I act towards the other colleagues? I cannot make eye contact, and if anyone touches me I need to know how to control myself and not freak out. How do I do that? I'm hoping that nobody will shake my hand or touch my arm... also how should I socialise with any of the colleagues that I don't know? I do not understand "small talk" and I always end up launching into a monologue about meteorology or something.

3. What is not appropriate to say in an office? Just so that I don't embarrass myself.

4. How do I cope with the background noise of phones ringing, people talking etc? I am considering to take my mp3 player with me, as I was allowed to do this last time, do you think that is a good idea?

5. Do you know any good relaxation techniques that I can do if I feel like I'm going to explode? For example, if three people at once try to talk to me, or if the fire alarm goes off for testing (I will try and avoid being in the building on Tuesdays at 11am which is when fire alarm testing is on), how do I stop myself from screaming/running out of the room?

Although I have got this voluntary job without an interview, I would like to know if anyone has any tips on interview skills, taking into account my difficulties due to being autistic? I can't make eye contact and I simply cannot stop my fidgeting with my hands because it calms me down. I also have a concern that 50% of the questions an employer will ask me, I wouldn't know how to answer, for example "tell me about yourself"; I wouldn't know how to start an answer to that, and what things about myself does the employer want to know?

If you could give me some suggestions that would be good. Thanks. ]]> General Support and Advice Steel Maiden http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188266 Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188265&goto=newpost Thu, 17 May 2012 05:59:28 GMT First of all, I'm sorry if there has already been a thread like this - you may close it if there was.

I have OCD and to be honest, it isn't a profound interference to my life, but it can certainly cause a lot of distress and reluctance.

It starts in my early adolescence.. I would just have to arrange objects in a specific order, I didn't make a big deal out of it so I dismissed it as prevailed organization skills. Then another form of OCD flared up and it was compulsive praying, I had to pray in the morning when I wake up and whenever I had the chance or something bad happened. I tried to resist once, to see if I could beat it.. I failed miserably and I couldn't get through a day without praying or else something terribly bad will happen. I've NEVER told anyone about it. No, I'm not religious person but have my beliefs in God, but this was extremely distressing but a comfortable reassurance at the same time in a very eloquent way. When I ended my prayer I had it to end it with "Thank you Lord, I love you" then had to look up to the sky (if I'm indoors, just look up or look outside the window) and visualize in this order; a green tick, a smiley face, a medical sign (the white and red one), a shield and end it with a Cross.. but whenever I finish off visualizing a Cross, there would always be a disturbing image that would disrupt my finalizing prayer.

I then progressed into checking things repeatedly, for the most redundant and obsolete reasons.. Whenever I put money into my wallet, put important paper-work into my bag, put a valuable in my room.. I would have to check more than 10 times, it got very distressing and I have to complete these tasks to get through the day. If I don't complete these, it will make me become very disturbed and worried. It was a compulsion and I had to instigate them, to checking if the zippers in my bag are next to each other and in line with the other zippers to checking the money in my wallet multiple times.

I have extremely disturbing images and thoughts (I wish not to speak of them, it's a very triggering subject) and have odd beliefs and always thought I would always be responsible for one's tragedy or if I spoke of something bad, it might happen so it prevented me from saying or doing anything that other people would see as normal to say or do. If someone took a piece of gum of me or a sip out of my bottle, I would always think I'd give them a disease and they would pursue me or if there was a splash of water on the floor, someone might slip and break their neck. Albeit the misery confined me, it made me very cautious and extremely organized in what I do.. I must arrange and perform rituals to prevent bad things from occurring, which seems irrational but is a compulsion. I mean, I can't complain about OCD all my life, I guess I just have to learn to live with it.

Later into my adolescence and was too shy to open up about it to many people. I've tried to open up to others, but they were too damn close-minded about it and were obviously ignorant and egocentric.. I told a few people, they said to just "stop the habit" then I told a friend and he told me to stop trying to look like something is wrong with me and that really annoyed me. Last but not least, my friend who has OCD caught me in action performing small tasks and asked me about it and then helped me open up about it, he was real help. Besides my friend with OCD and my other mate who accepted it, I just can't believe how stupid some people could actually be.. There are people who are suffering and we have egocentric humans not giving a crap.

So here I am, living with these obsessions and compulsions and wanted to give a brief summary on it.

To any OCD sufferers, you are certainly not the only one.

Thanks for reading. ]]> Mental Health Discussion and Support Vanished-point http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188265 Hey http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188264&goto=newpost Thu, 17 May 2012 05:45:56 GMT I'm new here. Heard about this site in one of my classes. I havent talked about my issues for almost over a year, so I kinda need some support. Im hoping I can find it here. Thanks ]]> Introductions Ilovepiggies http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188264 Can they...? http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188263&goto=newpost Thu, 17 May 2012 05:26:15 GMT I'm currently inpatient (section 3) Last night I self-harmed (I won't say how) and got put on 1:1, I guess I can understand that. Anyway, my friend died last year and they have taken away the photographs that I had of her. They believe I'm obsessed with her death. Was it right for them to do this? It left me feeling really distressed. ]]> Mental Health Discussion and Support razorbladekisses http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188263 Losing what I never found. http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188261&goto=newpost Thu, 17 May 2012 04:53:09 GMT
I don't know what to say. Things are bad. Or maybe they're not. Maybe there's just something so wrong with me that even when things are good I feel awful.

I don't think I can do this anymore. I'm contemplating going out and buying more tools. Maybe hurting myself will get rid of the worse thoughts. What does it matter anyway? Nobody would know. Nobody would care.

I don't think I want to be alive. I don't know what to do. There's no fight in me now. I feel utterly hopeless.

I don't even know why I made this thread, to be honest.

I'm just struggling. A lot.
]]> Serious Discussion and Advice Pseudonym. http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188261 The Silent Valley National Park http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188259&goto=newpost Thu, 17 May 2012 04:39:58 GMT Kerala, the paradise of nature lovers, is one of the best places for vacations. No one would miss the opportunity of a trip to Kerala (http://www.ayurcounty.com/place_to_visit.html), ‘God’s Own Country’. It is abound in forests and wildlife. It has... Kerala, the paradise of nature lovers, is one of the best places for vacations. No one would miss the opportunity of a trip to Kerala, ‘God’s Own Country’. It is abound in forests and wildlife. It has some of the best wildlife sanctuaries in India as it gives shelter to some of the threatened and endangered species of animals and birds. Kerala is flanked by the Eastern Ghats in the East and the Arabian Sea in the West. A total area of about 10336 square km is covered under forest in this state which constitutes about 26.6% of the total land area. The famous wildlife parks in Kerala are Silent Valley National Park, Periyar National Park, Eravikulam National Park and Wayanad National Park.

The core of the Nilgiri Biosphere Reserve is the Silent Valley National Park which is a gifted place on Earth. It was declared a national park in the year 1984 and covers an area of about 89.52 sq km. The best time to visit Silent Valley is between September and March. The park is mainly covered by Malabar Rain Forest which covers over 1000 species of plants. Kunithupuzha River runs through the park and provides water to the wildlife in the park. There are about 25 species of mammals, 170 species of birds and 35 species of reptiles in the forest. Species of animals such as macaque, tiger, leopard, sloth bear, elephant, Nilgiri Langur, Gaur and sloth bear are found in the forest. The major species of birds that are found are Ceylon frog mouth, great Indian Hornbill, Nilgiri laughing thrush, house martin, eagle, hawk edge, shaheen falcon, Indian black-crested baza, bonellis’ hawk short eared owl, peninsular scops owl and Malay bittern. ]]> General Chat slevero http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188259 hello http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188258&goto=newpost Thu, 17 May 2012 04:32:23 GMT Umm hi my name is Gage, I'm 18
I've been looking around here for a few weeks but haven't actually posted yet or anything
I'm not sure how much I'll actually post and stuff because this is sort of strange to me for now, but maybe!
So yeah, basically just wanted to say hi and everything :-) ]]> Introductions WolframTarant http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188258 depression ruining my grades http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188257&goto=newpost Thu, 17 May 2012 03:50:57 GMT I just finished my freshman year of college, and spring semester grades are started to be released. I got a B- on a class that's very important for my major. The class can count as long as I get a C- or above, but I don't think I did well enough to get into a good graduate school. This is really rough for me, because I've always done really well in school, and it's always been the only thing that I can consistently count on, but my depression has gotten to the point where I can't even go to class or finish my problem sets. I don't want to tell my parents, but I know that they will ask.

Also, I really want to get my shit together this summer. I know that if I can lose weight and get a breast reduction I'll feel much better and will be more motivated. I know it. If I could I would redo this year completely and retake all of the classes that I didn't do well in, but as it is I probably won't be able to graduate in four years and I can't afford to be in school for longer than necessary.

Help me. ]]> Serious Discussion and Advice NechamaLilach http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188257 Hi http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188256&goto=newpost Thu, 17 May 2012 01:15:05 GMT Hi there guys! My name is Kaylee, but you can all call me Kay. I guess there isn't much to tell about me... I really love music.. In fact, I don't know where I would be without it! Books are equally as important to me. Uhm, sorry. I'm not too good at introducing myself like this. Hope I can talk to whoever is reading this though soon so that we can have a real conversation and maybe I won't come off as so socially awkward ;)
I'm always trying to stay on the bright side... But that isn't always too easy =( I'm just really tired of having to act like I'm fine. But I'm sure you all know the drill. Looking forward to talking to you all...
-Kay ]]> Introductions kaymiri http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188256 Prince Philip makes me chuckle!!! http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188254&goto=newpost Wed, 16 May 2012 23:47:51 GMT I can't believe im linking to the daily fail AGAIN!

But yesh http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/arti...st_read_module ]]> General Chat random.swirls http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188254 los zetas decapitate over 40 bodies http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188253&goto=newpost Wed, 16 May 2012 23:43:12 GMT http://www.torontosun.com/2012/05/13/report-37-bodies-dumped-on-mexico-highway So senseless http://www.torontosun.com/2012/05/13...mexico-highway

So senseless ]]> News and Debate red_ry http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188253 Worried about ED? http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188252&goto=newpost Wed, 16 May 2012 23:10:18 GMT So, I have not officially been diagnosed with an ED but have been threatened to be diagnosed with Anorexia. After the death of my grandmother my anxiety was super high and I went to the dr and they put me on antidepressants, which totally... So, I have not officially been diagnosed with an ED but have been threatened to be diagnosed with Anorexia. After the death of my grandmother my anxiety was super high and I went to the dr and they put me on antidepressants, which totally suppressed my appetite. I went through three different medications before finding the right one and pretty much had no appetite for 3 months and barely ate anything and lost a lot of weight putting me at an underweight BMI. My dr had asked me if I was not eating to feel in control but I said no. Then my dr and counselor recommended that I go into the hospital which I refused because I am a single mom. So she put me on a treatment plan where I have to eat and gain weight and also not self harming as that was an issue too. I did not realize it was a matter of control until the two things that made me feel in control were taken away. I have been doing well with the treatment plan, but now that I am gaining weight I feel uncomfortable and not happy about it. I have barely reached a healthy BMI and I "know" that I am not fat, but I just don't feel that way. I am scared that I might be on my way to an ED :( Any help or advice? ]]> Eating Disorder Support Lynn134 http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum/showthread.php?t=188252